Have you ever had one of those days where you are just completely void of all energy and motivation? I normally don’t have too many of those, and when I do they don’t last long. That feeling usually lasts about half of a day for me. But, until recently, I had one horrible day where I had no pep in my step, no expression, no energy, at all. And what was worse…it all happened while I was at work one day.
I honestly have no idea why this feeling of lackluster just decided to drop in like that. I was feeling fine earlier that day, nothing was wrong and I had actually had a pretty decent day. As soon as I stepped into where I worked, immediately tense, tired and felt a sense of dread.
My guess: my Anxiety had picked the absolute worst time to mess with me. Where I work, I’m expected to have a happy face 24/7. I did my best that day and helped as best as I could. But as my shift went on, I just grew more tense and anxious. I could even feel my body become stiff with each person that came through my part of where I worked.
A part of me just wanted to cry on the spot because I just wanted to go home. And then when it came close to me clocking out, my body was telling me I had enough. I told my boss I was feeling like dirt, and thankfully she understood. I went home a little early, and just relaxed on the couch the rest of the night till I went to bed.
Why I guess I’m writing this blog is that my Anxiety will just flare up in the most unusual places, at the most bizarre times and I won’t have any control over it. At least when I’m at home, I can hide under my weighted teddy bear and wait till it subsides. In public, I still haven’t mastered how to comfort myself…
Hopefully one day, I will actually be able to control my Anxiety attacks, instead of them controlling me.